Month: September 2022

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The Bridge of Khazad-Dum

I wish to address a couple of issues, all of which can be found in the chapter titled ‘The Bridge of Khazad-Dum’. They are:

  1. The Balrog’s ‘Flight’
  2. Gandalf’s Commands
  3. Gandalf’s Fate

The famous question, do Balrogs have wings? Short answer: No. Long answer: Nopety nope nope, No. Longer answer: Most people see the sentence describing the Balrog, and see ‘he stretched his dark wings from one side of the cavern to the other’ and think that the debate is over. This is called a metaphor. Google it. The shadow and flame of the Balrog’s aura, for lack of better term, appeared to the hobbits as wings, not that he has physical, flesh-and-blood wings. And, if he fell, why didn’t he just fly? If he had wings, then Gandalf’s tactic was a little unwise…

Next Gandalf actually never said the words ‘You shall not pass’, as most media presents. It is a sad statement that has corrupted the minds of many a once-loyal Tolkien fan. The words were ‘You CANNOT pass’. If you yell at me for calling this a minor difference, then explain why the billions of memes can’t get 4 characters right. That’s an even more minor difference.

Finally, Gandalf’s fate. After Durin’s Bane pulled him down, they fell together through the mines of Moria. The film actually portrays this nicely. They came to the mountain of Zirakzigil and fought it out there. Gandalf smote down his foe, but then died. He wasn’t half dead, or temporarily dead, he was completely, 100%, dead. His Maia spirit returned to Valinor, and the Valar chose to send him back to Middle-Earth to finish the job he started. He took the form of Saruman, or rather, Saruman as he should have benn.

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Who is the Weirdo with a Blue Jacket and Yellow Boots

As soon as you saw the Argonath upon the opening of this great page, you probably started thinking, He’s got to have a Tom Bombadil article. So, here you go.

For those of you who haven’t read the book, this post isn’t for you. Sorry, if you haven’t read the book, this blog is not for you. Tom Bombadil was in the Old Forest between the Shire and Bree, and is the most puzzling enigma of Middle-Earth.

I have heard theories that Tom Bombadil is Eru Illuvatar, that he is Aule, or Ulmo, a random Maia, or even that he is a reincarnation of the Music of the Ainur itself, a theory which was quite interesting, but ultimately false. Each of these theories has one major flaw. I now present to you the true answer:

The answer to the Ultimate Question of Tom, Bombadil, and Goldberry is…. nobody knows, or will ever know. Tolkien even wrote in his letters: “Tom does not need speculation over, and is not improved by it. ” He is a nature spirit living in the Old Forest. That’s all there is to it. Tom Bombadil is, as Tom himself said, Tom Bombadil. When Frodo asked him who he was, he answered: “Don’t you know my name yet? That’s the only answer!” It really isn’t that complicated when you think about it.

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The Compressed Timeline

OK, I knew this was going to happen, they said they were doing it, I know why they did it, but I think it only makes their job more difficult.

Rings of Power makes use of a ‘compressed’ Middle-Earth timeline. The events in Middle-Earth with Sauron’s rise to power and Arondir take place in c. 1000 Second Age, whereas the events in Numenor, such as the reign of Tar-Miriel, Tar-Palantir, and ‘Chancellor’ Pharazon, happen in c. 3200. This was done to ‘avoid the human characters constantly dying out due to their relatively short lifespans’.

The greatest theme with Human – Elf romances, across all fantasy that contains them, is the lifespan difference and immortality. Usually the elf has to give up their immortality, but this is not always the case. Amazon puts Bronwyn and Arondir in this relationship, while cutting the sense of mortality and shortness of time that makes these stories potent.

I understand this was a move that had to be made in order to make a good show out of it that appealed to more than just the hardcore Tolkien fandom, but just looking at the timeline is just too much for me. I’d be fine if it was 100 years, maybe 500, but 2200 years difference, just gone, with several major events, is too much. Logically, this divide will shorten over the course of the seasons, but it is just a blow to the effectiveness of this story on me.

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Rings of Power 4

I’m back with the next installment of Rings of Power. Once again, i will cover each story we’ve seen independently.

Galadriel’s story has gone well so far. My fears about Miriel being portrayed wrong were healed, and Numenor is finally done properly. I’m getting a severe Chancellor Palpatine vibe for Pharazon, and I’m not sure if I like it, though I think that’s bound to happen anyway. Lastly, I’m not quite sure why Miriel said the other six Palantir were lost; we know where most of them are.

Elrond’s continues on the same track as before, but I’m a little confused. It’s Sauron that teaches the elves to make the Rings of Power, but so far, no Sauron in Eregion.

Finally, I stand by my previous statement with Arondir. Though Adar is fleshed out to be a much better guy, I’m still incredibly confused at why he has an elvish name among orcs.

While I’m at it, I came up with a fantastic theory for Meteor Man: everybody’s been talking about Earendil a bit, and he did get turned into a star… I hate this idea, and if I see it fulfilled Amazon will have trouble regaining my faith. But only time will tell.

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Golden Hairs

This is the first post from Random LotR Fact That Popped Into My Head This Morning. It concerns two of my favourite characters: Gimli and Galadriel.

Most of you likely know the story of Galadriel’s gift to Gimli; he asked for a golden hair of hers, she gave him three. That’s all good, but what most of you don’t know, is that Feanor asked her for the exact same gift, three times, and she rejected him three times. So just to spite him, she gave Gimli 3. I can just imagine the ghost of Feanor absolutely freaking out when he heard this :D. Oh, and Social Media exists in Arda: after the third rejection, Unfinished Tales even says, ‘They were un-friends forever.’ My guess is she blocked him first.